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bullshit [20 Apr 2004|03:05am]
theyre all bullshit.

each and every single one of them, and its my fault, the only thing i use them for is destroying myself further and deeper than i could achieve just through self loathing.

fuck this.,

fuck everything.

i wish id never tasted happiness because all everyone does is take it away.

i want to cut my arm wide open.

Se nos estan muriendo los poetas [20 Mar 2004|08:01pm]
Amada mia,
Vengo a ti en decimoprimera hora
vengo a ti como el beso ante a la innevitable despedida
amada mia,
soy el ultimo destello de rojo
en la rose que murio antes de ser regalo

Amada mia,
llevo dentro de mi pecho el mas agrio de mis dolores
y me veo obligado,
oh amada mia,
a crucificarme perdido sobre la cruz de esta noticia
sienteme bajo tu sombra, con la culpa de quien traiciono a su redentor
al haber dejado que suceda lo siguiente...

Amada mia...
se nos estan muriendo los poetas

La luz ya no baila ni besa,
y el dolor de tu ausencia no se postra ante mi con tierna cabeza
ay amada mia,
se nos estan muriendo los poetas

Me juran , de numeros colgados de logica,
que la luna no esta compuesta por tus suspiros
y un mundo cuadrado y cuadriculado
me niega que tus ojos sean el cielo en el que descancansan
las almas de dos estrellas

se nos estan muriendo los poetas,
y me juran que el oceano en algun lado es tan profundo como tu ternura
y, audacia cobarde!
esperan que yo crea que el aire que necesito es cualquier otra cosa que tu esencia

se nos estan muriendo los poetas,
y del liquido que brotan las lagrimas del despecho,
del vendaval incontenible de la rabia del amor,
del Dios y señor del universo que nace y muere entre nuestros labios,
en cada beso,
queda el polvo gris de un mundo sin poesia.

amada mia,
Existe en esta realidad desafiando mis sueños.
Rebosa la copa de mi corazon con sonrisas que no caben sino en la infinidad del cielo de angeles infinitos.
Que de tu pecho nazcan las llamas de la metafora apasionada
que en tus manos se escondan los destellos de divinidad en este mundo imperfecto.
deja de ser cualquier cosa que no seas tu.

amada mia,
Y en este alma-desierto, has que broten los rios de poesia
que este mundo esta secando,
poeta muerto
poeta muerto.

por que, amada mia,
se nos estan muriendo los poetas.

Daniel Zambrano

girls are zombies [16 Mar 2004|07:26pm]
I know what im doing, im putting an end to it, once and for all, and it will go up in flames, just like everything else, because the only thing that ever did cleanse was fire.

it doesnt matter who she is or what she says, its always the same bullshit, theyre all dead inside.

3 broke me| sMASH!

dream [09 Mar 2004|08:10am]
I had the weirdest dream, but it was awesome..

I don't remember the first part very well except that we were in some city, I think chicago, and my dad was helping me move stuff into an apartment. I was expecting cortney to come over and when she got there she helped put some of the bags in the room we were going to be in. Then me and cortney started making out and cuddling, and im not sure if there was people in the apartment beforehand or not, but suddenly there was some comotion and we we were suddenly running out being chased by something or someone and we went into this..small restaurant? And we all kind of looked like final fantasy characters come to life.. and there was a girl there with a baby, and it started coming out that whoever was chasing us was after the baby and her. So i kept going back and forth between cortney and this girl, and we're trying to barracade the doors and we have all these weapons... like crossbows and shit, so everyone was getting their weapons ready.

Me and cortney and the girl with the baby start talking and she starts acting really weird and then breaks down and says the baby is mine, to which i freak out, but she mentions some party that i seem to remember and then i remember her, and yeah..i had a baby... so in the middle of that, whatever was chasing us comes to the door and everyone is getting ready to fight it, and the girl with baby hides in a room in the back, and then the door breaks and all these guys in suits come through, like a hundred of them, in different colored suits, and we're fighting them, it's like a fucking movie. Cort has this double sided blade thing and im fighting with these like..claws, like wolverines, but u hold them. Then i run off with the girl that has the baby... and it gets a little hazy here, but we end up captured, betrayed by one of the people who was with us, and im hanging on this wall and theres these two doods, one of them is the one that betrayed us, telling me how theyd rather have nothing than a mortal child heir to the throne. I woke up when i was tearing my hands from the chains and screaming at them to give me my child...

Good dream.


Ode [29 Feb 2004|01:46pm]
You're not sure what an ode actually entails, but you're sure you could get one down about this particular topic quite easily. So let's go over it.

The mind-blowing beauty of a girl's suitcase as it sits by your bed, next to her shoes. Her shoes, of course, are adorable. Maybe they are leather semi-formal looking shoes, you're not a shoe guy, so to you they are adorable because they're a little more formal than her childish spirit should be meandering about in. Maybe they're flip-flops (weather permiting), with the obligatory cartoon characters on them, but these are hers, so they have cartoon characters youve never seen, but they sure are cute. If you've learned anything from women, ever, it's that shoes matter. So be sure to note both of these points.

Her purse is sitting on her suitcase. This means that she considers this place, your place, at least for now, her homebase. If she had to rush somewhere, she'd run in here, take her purse, or things from it, and run out. When she comes back from places, her purse will come to rest there, possibly before she gets a drink.This comforts you.

The suitcase itself represents permanant ephimerality, or momentary permanence. It's a visit, but it's a visit with time to invest. This comforts you, as well as excites you. Her clothes are in there, and in there is in here, in your room, in your place. It's amazing how many levels you can give to where she is, but I guess to you, it's more amazing on how many levels she can be anywhere.

And so it sits there, telling you it's not that bad and that she's aroudn somewhere, a girl's suitcase by the foot of your bed. It's a good thing.

[17 Feb 2004|02:40am]
i dont think ive ever been more scared in my life.

dear god help me.


[29 Jan 2004|11:54pm]
This is new. Things will be new again.


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